It's killing me inside too.

Don't think that this is something that I wanted to do because it wasn't. It needed to be done and quite frankly, it seemed like the only choice I had to make. I don't love you anymore. I loved who you used to be. The girl I met a year ago. The quiet girl on the tennis team who didn't have many friends. The shy girl who had trust issues with people. Most importantly, the girl who understood me like no one else could. You taught me to see positivity in my life and now look at you. Completely cynical. You're acting as if I wanted this to happen. If I could, I would relive our friendship. Too bad I can't. Too bad you wouldn't. You're having the time of your life right now. Too bad I'm not part of it. Hopefully, you'll go back to how you were before, because that was when you were at your best. Until then, goodbye.

Wow I've been lagging.

Starting tonight, resuming my nightly blogs.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010 11:51PM

Fuuuuuuuuck my booooooorrrring assssssss liiiiiiiife. School, practice, eat, end. Goodnight.

Monday, January 11, 2010 11:10PM

Today = bullshit. School, practice, and ate at a buffet. Goodnight stalkers.

Friday, January 8th, 2010 10:08PM

Wow today was fun. I got to school on time today. Haha. Then during lunch, Kier beasted on me in a duel using my own cards. I really need to work on my strategy skills. But then again, shaine is fucking terrible. Haha. Oh well. Then after school I went to watch the game. Oh man. Good job varsity. Seriously, I was actually cheering and shit. Haha. My nigga #15 th0. Got home around 9 to see the Warriors down by 18 points. Then surprisingly, they won. WTFFFFFF. Haha. Anyways, I'm tired as fuck. Unless something happens this weekend I guess I won't do my nightly blogs. Haha goodnight blogspot and stalkers. I seriously love you all.

Thursday, January 7th, 2010 11:08PM

Well, I told her. I feel great that I told her since I've had the biggest crush on her since I met her. She sees me as a brother to her and I respect that, forreal. I just can't help but feel bummed out that she doesn't share the same feelings back. But it's cool, she told me wsup, and I understand so it's all good. Then Polly comes back into the picture.....

I found out that Polly told Sheryl that I liked her before I told her. Naturally with my guy instincts, I got upset that she beat me to it. So I texted her asking her why she told her when I wanted to tell her myself. This was pretty much angry talking so I didn't mean to just get mad like that. And she told Sheryl and Sheryl got mad at me for making it a big deal when I shouldn't have in the first place. So I admitted to Polly that it was my fault and that she shouldn't feel bad like that. But noooo Polly's fucking weirdass keeps on saying that it's her fault. Uggggh. How the fuck did Polly get into our buisness in the first place? Anyways, basketball game tomorrow. I need to sleep. Goodnight, stalkers.

Wednesday January 6th, 2010 11:57PM

So I think she knows now. Which sucks because I wanted to tell her myself without her finding out on her own. Hopefully I'll have the balls to tell her tomorrow without crashing and burning. *sigh. Goodnight blogspot. I will see you tomorrow.

Tuesday, January 5th, 2010 11:56PM

I was pretty happy today. Showing off that I called Sheryl last night and we talked for 2 hours. I don't like how she talks about Jordan and Marvin all the time. But then again, she doesn't know any better and doesn't know that I like her yet. I want to take her out on valentines day to watch valentines day. Anyways, I need sleep. Goodnight.

Edit 12:12am: I don't appreciate how Jenny talks to me about Joe considering that I'm super close to Connie. Jenny is one of my good friends no doubt, but it's really none of my business. I take no sides, especially between two really good friends.

Monday, January 4th, 2010, 10:26PM

I am currently on the phone with Sheryl. =))))))))))))) Nothing can stop me from being this happy right now. I will finish this later. Haha

EDIT: Tuesday January 5th, 2010, 12:46AM

2 hours. I'm really happy about this right now, even though I was pretty much in depression mode the whole afternoon. I'm not sure if I should tell her tomorrow anymore. Like the fact that we were on the phone for two hours made it less awkward, but it only makes it harder to tell her. I think I will tell her tomorrow. Just to get it over with. K it's 12:46am and I need to sleep. Goodnight.

Sunday, January 3, 2010. 11:55 PM

I guess I'm gonna do this nightly journal thingy. Just for kicks. School's tomorrow, again. I hate school, forreal. My sleeping pattern is fucked up. And I hate Ms. Wright's bitchass, Mr. Ahmad can't really teach, so it's hard in chemistry and Mr. Alvarez goes WAY too fast and it's just too difficult. Anyways, my nonexistent "love life" got worse than it already is. I really hope I don't fuck things up with Sheryl. Polly is done for, completely out of the picture. But yeah, hopefully I van get back on track with my life, I'm tired of not doing anything. Well, I have to sleep. Goodnight.

Every night, I write about whatever is on my mind in the notes thingy on my iPod. Might as well put it to use, right? So I guess I'll copy it down word for word onto here so I can actually post things onto here. Whether it be random raps on my head or deep meaningful thoughts. Depends on my mood. Haha. Kbye.

First blog of the year.

Wasted on this.





Happy New Years. =)